Everyone grieves differently, so one standard rule may not apply. But here´s my two cents.
I recently went through some tough times. The people that love me wrote me several times throughout the day in the beginning, and then at different times during the days after.
Just the question
hey, how are you?
Very few people gave consoling words and phrases, and better that way. Hey how are you was enough to feel loved and accompanied during hard times.
I´ll keep that in mind next time someone needs a hand. Hey how are yous.